Friday, June 11, 2010


I thought this whole cult thing was through with, but I suppose it's not. While sardonicsteve is receiving strange videos and nightmares, I ran across some kid at the mall today, and it was just an ordinary kid, too. You wouldn't expect anything from him, a redneck kid. Plus, I didn't expect anything out of the ordinary to happen, especially because this is Georgia, and all that cult stuff seems to be happening in Live Oak.

In any case, I walked around the mall, went into the bookstore, and headed towards the YA section, like I always do first before perusing the rest of the store. This kid's just looking through some books, didn't really bother checking what he was looking at, and I pull up the book about the girl who's hiding the truth that her mother's a hoarder. He turns to me, and for a second I think he's going to comment about the book. Instead, he just says, "If I were you, I'd fear them." And he just returns to looking at books.

This isn't coincidence anymore. This is freaking Georgia for crying out loud, miles away from where all of this is supposedly happening. And unless this kid's from Florida, I have a hard time believing this is a hoax anymore.

I'm positive the 'them' he's referring to is talking about that cult. Of course, why wouldn't I fear them? Their murderers for crying out loud!

Should I be fearing my own safety?

Friday, June 4, 2010

A Note

Okay, so I have no idea what the fuck is going on, and I'm sure as hell freaked out. My family and I got home from Zaxby's, and I found this on my pillow. For some reason, I thought it was some mail my mom dropped off in my room that she forgot to tell me about or something. I mean, I am still waiting for an order from Etsy, so I was really hoping it was that.

Instead, I got it from that freaky cult, and I don't know what to believe anymore. I'm scared as fuck, because I don't know how anyone could have gotten in, how they could have known where I lived or whatever, but maybe my playing around with them too much was a bad thing. Of course, I could have called the police, but what they hell was I going to say? "Yeah, 911, some freaky cult left a note on my pillow, but there are like no clues that anyone broke in." Whatever. I'm keeping this to myself.

All doors were locked, all windows were closed, so I dunno what's going on. Perhaps The Fear? I dunno. I just don't want to believe in all this crap. I mean, I suppose I could believe it's a real cult and what not, but I refuse to believe in this Ylmxntrth garbage. There are cults all over the world that have you believe in some freaky shit, and I think this is no different.

I know it's not the greatest picture, but I tried my best. Basically it's telling me to not mess with Ylmxntrth, and my blasphemy will cost me my life next time. My throat will be on a skewer, and the only reason I was spared was because I played into Ylmxntrth's hands or some crap like that. But despite angering them, whoever wrote this or something, I please Ylmxntrth, because I supposedly played into some sort of trap.

If anyone has anymore information, it would be greatly appreciated! Please, I'm scared. Is it possible they have charters all over the US, like gangs or something??? HELP! D:

Thursday, June 3, 2010


All my followers, I have moved my blog to this now:

So please follow me there

Saturday, March 27, 2010

The Dunning-Kruger Effect

Nathan Bransford posted a blog on this, so if you want to read my opinion on it, I suggest reading this first:

In any case, for the most part, I can see how the Dunning-Kruger Effect would hold some truth to it. However, it's my belief that those who think they TRULY suck wouldn't be getting better at all. In fact, I don't think they'd be doing it at all. I suck/hate drawing (realism drawing); therefore, why would I want to improve? Deep down, people who keep writing don't actually believe they suck, but keep telling themselves that because they are embarassed to think otherwise, to think they can actually improve and are improving. People who keep trying are just putting on this illusion that they think they suck. I'm certain, deep down, they are just uncertain and would rather not say whether or not they suck.

That's how I am. I know I'm good, but when I do a piece of writing, I put my mindset on neutral so I can become open to criticism. I do not think that the piece sucks, but I also do not think the piece is good. I let my beta readers decide all that for me.

Does this mean I don't have my self-doubt moments? No, but it's rare that I do doubt myself. I've had them before, about once last year, but it quickly passed. I can say from experience, though, that during that self-doubt moment, I didn't want to write at all. I just didn't believe I could do it well.

I suppose it differs for everyone, though. If I believe I suck, I'm not going to bother getting better at it. But if I go in with confidence and a neutral mindset about my abilities, I do get better at it. I also think I just have to love what I'm doing. I suck at realism drawing, and I hate it. I think there's a common connection there. Yet, I love writing, and I'm getting better at it, and I know I don't suck.

There is a difference between confidence and arrogance, which Dunning-Kruger fails to mention. I think if you want to get good, you absolutely need to have confidence. Of course, if you think you're great and don't need to improve, you probably aren't that good.

I'm confident, not arrogant. Don't be afraid to have confidence in what you do. Just realize that you can keep improving and getting better. I'm certain Stephen King doesn't think he sucks, but I also believe he's aware he can keep improving.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

The Oddville Press Issue VI

It's out! It's out! It's out! And guess what? You can find my name under the Mast Head under copy editors! Yay! So, I have to get a special shout out to my buddy Mosby Barley, who go this awesome poem published. You should read it. It's pretty and shiny.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Sorean Magazine

Sometime last month I applied for a position at a relatively new magazine still getting on its feet, and now I'm an editor/writer for it! So, if you have a twitter account, follow it at @SoreanMagazine.

You can also find Sorean at:

Basically we're a Gothic-based magazine that revels in the macabre. At first, I wasn't sure if this kind of magazine was for me, but then I realized I do write sort of Gothic-esque things, Witch Tourniquet being pretty Gothic, I'd say. And this new WIP that I'm dying to get back to, Beautiful Nightmare, is pretty Gothic. Dead Poet's Pendulum as well.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Gender in YA

Who knows how often this has been blogged about, but I know #genderinYA is ravenously discussing it, so I thought I'd chime in with what a blog post can do that I won't be able to convey as well through Twitter.

As a female writer, technically still a teenager (age 19), I read books that appeal to me. I do not care if they are male or female protagonists. Most of my books, however, have female protagonists, simply because I read a lot of YA, and YA is mostly dominated by female progtags, perhaps because female writers dominate YA. And there is nothing wrong with this, and I do not understand why people are making such a big deal out of it. If guys want to write about guys, that's fine. If they do not want to write YA, that is fine as well. If guys want to write about girls, then cool. If girls want to write about guys, then cool as well. But as a reader, I am not bothered at all by the lack of male protagonists. I would not be bothered by the lack of female protagonists. When I read a novel, I don't really take the gender of the character into consideration. I judge the character based on how well-developed he or she is; not gender.

While it is true that boys read less than girls, probably because females dominate YA, I think we need to change this attitude. I do not think the answer to getting boys to read more is by having writers write male protags. To me,there is something sexist about this ideology, one in which women have for years been struggling to get rid of.

Writing used to be dominated by men, so there were tons of male protags. Now that it's dominated by women, with female protags, there's suddenly a problem in trying to get boys to read. And perhaps this has to do with cultural attitudes more than anything else.

My fiance Jeff does not care if a book has male or female protagonists. He read The Gemma Doyle trilogy and enjoyed it. And this is something because he's a huge John Grisham fan. But if Jeff can enjoy novels with female protagonists, then I do not see why other boys cannot. I don't think boys are born shunning books with female protagonists. They don't just start reading, thinking 'Gross! I'm never going to read a book with a girl main character!' Seriously, I think it has something to do with culture, and we need to change this.

I'm also of the opinion that true readers, true lovers of literature, wouldn't care about gender. So perhaps it's not just the fact that there are more female characters in literature. But whatever it is, the answer IS NOT to force oneself to write books with male protags, or to even advocate that writers need to write books with male protags for YA.

Yes, it's disturbing that there are dramatically less boys reading than girls, but it's even more disturbing that boys seem to have this inherent attitude about not reading books with female protags. This is supposed to be a culture devoid of sexism (ideally), and we're trying to figure out, yet again, something that involves more women than men. I'm willing to bet that if YA were dominated by men, no one would make a fuss about it, simply because it's been that way for most of human history. But now that it's becoming increasingly dominated by women (or is), there's a problem.

I don't know how boys are being raised in this culture, but someone out there keeps telling them what they can and can't like, and it's bothersome. Male protagonists are great, because guys can relate to them more, but I think it's healthy for a guy to see how a girl thinks. I mean, let's be frank, guys seem to have a harder time learning about we females than we do about them, and reading about a female makes that world a little bit easier. It's also healthy for a girl to see how a guy thinks.

I remember reading in Nathan Bransford's blog about gender in YA. One poster proclaimed that males want to read different things from females, which perhaps might be true, and said poster even admitted to being stereotypical before posting a lot of stereotypical male things: things being blown up, sex, drunkenness, implying there are no consequences to any of these. But, as I've said before, I don't think writing about these things is the answer, as it's only perpetuating male stereotypes, and let's be frank, those aren't positive things, and it actually makes me as a female question the intelligence of males. As a female reader, I like reading books with intelligent, curious characters, and that includes both male and female. I would think guys would want their sex shown in a positive light as well, unless they think getting drunk or having wild, promiscuous sex is somehow a positive thing.

In my new WIP, my main character is male, but that's not because of the lack of males in YA. I've written from a male perspective before, I've even had a short story published from a male perspective, and am currently subbing another with a male perspective. I just think this WIP calls for a male perspective. Whenever I come up with an idea, I don't really think hard about the gender of my character. I just choose a gender that fits naturally with the story, avoiding bias and sexism and stereotypes and all that.

Continuing on, there's apparently still a problem with, even if a female writer writes from a male perspective, boys apparently still don't want to read it, although they'll read male authors with male characters. I am not going to remain unbiased with this. That is just plain sexism, and though I may be insensitive for saying so, I think our culture needs to change this attitude. Seriously, like fast. There are boys out there who do read books with female protags or by female authors, but they're a small bunch.

Well, after all this said, what can we as writers do about it? We shouldn't have to do anything about it. It's society that needs to help boys change their views. Women writers shouldn't have to shape their writing around the desires of boys. No one should really have to shape their writing around anyone's desires.